2/2/13 Happy Ground Hog Day

Steve

Happy Ground Hog Day!  As of this writing, I have no idea what’s been going on back in Punxsutawney, PA., home of that famous woodchuck who is so good at forecasting the weather.  But I can tell what we’ve been up to, in Shoreline, WA.  It’s pretty quiet around here.  Daniel has left for the gym.  Renee has left for a babysitting gig and Gabrielle is peacefully resting on the couch after her first big outing since all this began.  We actually went to a movie today: Argo.  It was great.  Spoiler alert….nah, just kidding…I won’t tell you about the movie, but we did indeed enjoy it.  At the start, I led Gabrielle past the snack bar and waved my arm in a sweeping motion is if I were pharaoh waving to his people.  I told Gabrielle, that she was my princess and that as a special treat, one time only, I would buy her anything she wanted: Dots, a hot dog (or two), “nachos” with that oh-so-tasty fake cheese, popcorn.  Didn’t get a nibble on any of it.  She just wanted to head in to the movie.  Shortly after sitting down, she whispered in my ear, “what’s that awful smell?”  It was fresh movie house popcorn two rows back and it smelled oh so tempting (at least to me).  Not to her.  She almost made us move farther away.  Yep, I guess that ol’ chemo can wreak havoc on your taste buds and the old schnozzola as well.

As I said, things are quiet around here, but we’ve got a rather strange sight out the window that I just have to tell you about.  It’s dark, but an eerie red glow is coming from a 12 foot tall inflatable Santa Claus from the house across the street.  He’s all lit up as if the house is still in the running for best Christmas décor on the block.  Everybody else around has taken their Christmas lights down.  I managed that feat last weekend in the rain.  Good timing.  The puzzling thing about this Santa fellow is that, honest to goodness, he wasn’t there yesterday, nor all season for that matter, as far as I can tell.  Why’d he show up now?  That’s what I’d like to know. 

Well, I’ve got my own theory:  Santa’s coming!  And he just had to wait till all the hoopla of Christmas with all its gaudy commercialization died down till he could make his appearance and deliver the goods.  And, boy has he come through for us, once again.  Take this afternoon for instance.  When we got home from the movie (you sure you don’t want me to let you know how the movie ends?), there was a wonderful meal waiting for us from Gabrielle’s friend Karen.  Thank you so much!  As soon as I’m done here, we’re going to dive into that chicken soup, salad, homemade bread and brownies.  Can’t wait…am writing as fast as I can.

Two days ago, we got a package in the mail.  It was from Janet in California and was full of all sorts of goodies which Gabrielle mentioned in a previous post.  What she didn’t mention was that one of the items that Janet sent was a bag of dried up green stuff.  I got home just as Gabrielle had finished chopping it up and smoking some of it.  She looked rather disappointed that she was still nauseous.  To add insult to injury, she was turning several shades of green herself.  I took a look at the stuff and told her it wasn’t the much coveted medical marijuana but kale chips. Just as well.  Who needs it, when you’ve got healthy stuff like kale and chicken soup to nosh on?  Just kidding…this is a non-smoking, non-doped up house! 

I got an e-mail from a kindly patient today, N. (no HIPPA violations for me...who knows, it may not even be his or her real initial), who sent along an Amazon gift card.  I also had a great visit with my mom today who showered me with warmth, a meat pie from the British pastry shop and hot coffee (actually didn't shower in it, that was a figure of speech).  It was relaxing sitting by her fire and having a chance to just unwind.  Oh, and she assured me there is no burn ban, so if the feds come, she made me light the fire, honest.  Older brother John's on the other side of the state, so I can't blame him like I prefer to do.  So many people have been so nice to us. 

But, back to Gabrielle’s health, which is the real reason we’re keeping this blog going.  Today’s been pretty good.  Diarrhea is slowing way down and we got a call from Dr. Sato that she does not have C. diff, which is a huge answer to prayer.  Also, since she only had one medicine in the chemo session yesterday, she is not feeling as lousy as last Saturday about this time.  So, that’s two sessions down, 16 to go. 

Now, if I can just keep Gabrielle from smoking the rest of the kale, I think I will put some of Orville Redenbacher’s “Movie Time” popcorn into the microwave just to tempt her a little more, gets those gastric juices flowing…

2/1/13 Day 8

Dearest family and friends,

Gabrielle here.  First of all, a correction!  Yesterday was not day zero!  Apparently you don't go back to zero until your 21 day cycle is up.  They think of it in six 21-day cycles.  So yesterday was day seven and today is day 8.  Good.  Got that cleared up!

Let's start with the good news!  My counts were good enough for me to get chemo #2 today!  And chemo #2 was only half as long as chemo #1 since it was only in my shoulder port through my veins, not the second drug in my abdominal cavity.  I am so happy to have two down and "only" 16 to go!

More good news.  I still have my hair.  :-)  As I was blow drying it this morning I said to the Lord--I'm sorry for all the times I've complained about my hair this past year.  It felt like a "bad hair year" where I just couldn't style it right very often.  Now I'm just glad to have it for however much longer it remains! 

Other good news would be the sunshine!  I loved my outdoor walk in the neighborhood today with no rain and a beautiful sunset sky.  And of course, there were the kindnesses.  So many kindnesses day after day from all of you.  Today our friends Jan and Bill brought us homemade Vietnamese style pho soup for dinner!  Fantastic and healthy!  The cherry pie for dessert in honor of it being president's month today is maybe not so healthy, but delicious.  I also received several encouraging cards today including one from a friend who is in her upper 80's and has recently battled life-threatening pneumonia.  And she said "they say I can drive again soon and so just call me anytime and I'll take you anywhere you need to go or come help in any way."  Another card contained an Amazon gift card!  How wonderful for buying books for my kindle and other things I get on Amazon like ginger capsules for nausea.  And a card from one of my SPU donor/friends offered to bring us Black Pearl Chinese dinner whenever I feel up for it!  I LOVE Black Pearl!  Each card I receive is such a blessing and is a bright spot in what can otherwise be long, dull days.  So thank you all so much!  Also...just remembered...I brushed with my new Sonicare from John and Sally (our "Tooth Number 4" prayer warrior) today.  It's amazing!  Such clean teeth!  Hopefully my smile will dazzle you when you visit me.  :-)

On the slightly worse news side, I am battling very bad diarrhea.  Sorry to say that word in writing.  Gross.  It "could" be from the antibiotic I'm taking, or on the worse side, it could be a bacterial infection that is kind of bad that you can get when on antibiotics and with a lowered immune system called Clostridium difficile, or C. diff for short.  So as we speak tonight, the lab at NW Hospital is figuring that out for me.  Please pray that it isn't C. diff or if it is, that the new antibiotic they will switch me too will be able to kill it even with my lowered immune system.  And pray the diarrhea STOPS!  One other tiny spot of potentially bad news is my hematocrit--amount of blood I'm making--is 28.5.  Normal range is 36-46, but my normal generally has hovered around 34 for years.  If it sinks to the low 20's I may need my first blood transfusion. 

Not sure what the weekend will be like.  Hopefully better than last weekend which was awful.  Thanks for your continued love and prayers.  Am excited soon to go tear one more link off our chemo chain of days.  One day at a time and God helps us through each one, sending love, kindnesses, peace, comfort, and letting us lean into His strength when ours is gone.  May He bless you and hold you close today as well.

Love,
Gabrielle

1/13/13 Day Zero

Hello friends and family,

Gabrielle here.  Today Daniel and I went to the wig shop!  We tried on lots of different ones and ended up with something pretty similar to my own hairstyle that will be ordered on Tuesday and arrive next Friday.  You won't see me in it too often.  I plan to mostly just wear scarves or hats, but figured the wig would come in handy if I go to the Symphony or something.  Renee bought me tickets to see Vivaldi's Four Seasons at Benaroya Hall in a couple of months.  That will be a wig-worthy event!

The good news/bad news of the day is that the one-day culture of the needle aspiration of the abdominal port showed no infection.  But the bad news is--Steve and I know it IS infected.  I am having fevers (two days straight) and it is painful and there is a huge red circle spreading from it.  He marked the circle with black ink and the date/time so we can watch it grow or shrink as I take these antibiotics. 

Today is considered day zero--the day before chemo.  I went ahead and took my day zero steroid dose to prepare for tomorrow, but am truly wondering if with an infection and fevers they will be able to give me chemo tomorrow.  Daniel and I will show up there at 10.  They will draw blood and send it to the lab. The doctor will look at my red skin and black ink artwork on my abdominal port and my record of fevers today and then will decide yes or no to chemo.  Please pray for this infection to go away soon!  For the doctor to figure it out and for the antibiotics to work.  Pray they won't have to surgically remove this port, let the infection heal, and put in another one on the other side.  These are my little worries of the day today, but am casting these cares on God who cares for us.  (1 Peter 5:7...I think!)

Lastly, for the blessings of today (besides the new wig).  Today we were showered with kindnesses YET AGAIN.  My friend Lynette showed up for a visit with beautiful peach roses and a frozen lasagne for our freezer.  Our friends Howard and Nancy made us delicious pasta for dinner tonight which Howard delivered around 5:30 PM today.  Did I mention yesterday that Mike and Colleen brought us a quart of homemade yogurt and will continue that each week?!  And today I received six of the sweetest, most encouraging cards from friends at church, SPU, King's, and Steve's work.  Oh--and last but NOT least, my college friend Janet and her husband Tracy from California mailed me a care package!!  It contained homemade ginger cookies (ginger is good for nausea), kiwis, lemons, and meyer lemons that they and their neighbor grow, kale chips, a blue head wrap/scarf, and a sweet card (which would make card #7 today). 

I wish each of us could always feel as loved as I feel right now--by God and our family and friends.  Thank you all SO much for the love, kindnesses, and prayers to God who is the Great Physician.

Love,
Gabrielle

P.S.  Today I tried a WHOLE dropperful of the "daytime" marijuana essence for nausea.  Still nothing.  Tomorrow I'll try the nighttime one which is more potent, though it may make me sleepy.  Better sleepy than nauseous!

P.P.S.  They said you can lose your sweet tooth during chemo--and they are right!  Those of you who know me know I live for good chocolate and desserts.  Not anymore.  This is truly the Twilight Zone of my life!  My house is filled with Fran's and Theo and See's Chocolates, along with homebaked goods from friends--and I just can't do it!  AAAAAHHHHHHH!  Torture!  :-)

1/30/13 Wednesday evening

Steve

Wednesday evening update.  On the plus side, Gabrielle is finding that, just as predicted, her nausea has been improving little by little and has not needed to resort to any sorts of formerly illegal substances to achieve that goal.  Chef Daniel made amazing spaghetti and meatballs with green beans and French bread last night that Gabrielle pretty much inhaled.  And right now, he is out in the kitchen whipping up some squash ginger soup (with nary a cookbook in sight…the kid is amazing!)  As an aside, where the old man failed, Renee came through for Gabrielle and came up with tincture of THC from good ol’ Fweedom on Aurora.

 [Oh, I have to brag about Renee too…two days ago, she handed me a present that took quite a bit of searching…my very own kintsugi bowl!!!  I love it!  She said they are actually quite hard to find and ended up getting this one out of Japan.  I have it on the mantel and keep some of my favorite pieces of beach glass in it.  As is apparent, I am increasingly drawn to broken things.]

My kintsugi bowl!

Daniel is cooking us dinner tonight!

But back to Gabrielle…

On the down side, her abdominal port has continued to give her grief.  Yesterday, she was on a loading dose of IV antibiotics and has been taking Augmentin since then.  But with worsening pain, a quick call to Dr. M.’s office this morning resulted in moving up the planned abdominal ultrasound from tomorrow to this morning.  After seeing the ultrasound report, Dr. M., decided that she wanted a needle aspiration of some fluid around the port, so then it was back to the IR department (IR: interventional radiology) for the procedure.  The nice radiologist (Dr. Joseph) showed the future Dr. Daniel what he was doing and let him get a nice and close look of the whole process.  Now, part of Gabrielle’s abdominal fluid is sitting in a petri dish to see if anything worrisome will grow.  The preliminary report looks good, as the gram stain (initial microscopic look see) didn’t show any organisms.  This is good news as it means that she is on track to get her next chemo treatment in two days. 

Her abdominal pain has been getting worse, and Gabrielle has been back on the pain meds (which she had been off of for several days).  So, it’s one of those three steps forward, two steps back days.  That’s two days in a row of spending more time at the hospital. Tomorrow: lab test to see how the blood count is doing.  If that is fine, then round two of chemo for Friday.  Hopefully, tomorrow will be less eventful than the past couple of days.

Gabrielle's mother, Gloria, just stopped by for a quick visit to check on her baby.  In the midst of the conversation, Gabrielle talked to her about cancer with amazing words of wisdom, peace and clarity of mind:

"You know, at first, I thought that it's a bummer to get cancer.  But then I thought, 'lot's of people get cancer all the time', so why should I expect to escape it?  As a matter of fact, why not me?  I'm strong.  I have a strong faith.  We all have a strong faith.  I have a great family and a terrific support team.  Why not me, that's what I figure.  Better me than some other folks who don't have all that going for them".  And that's the kind of attitude that Gabrielle has going into this thing.  Watch out, cancer!  You've got a formidable foe to contend with.

Prayers for today, should you feel so inclined:  improved abdominal pain, good blood test tomorrow, and continued stamina for what promises to be a long, arduous process.  And, of course, prayers of thanks for our wonderful kids, family and all of you for your support.  No hyperbole here, we couldn’t do it without you.

1/29/13 Going with the flow

Hello dear friends and family,

Gabrielle here.  Today was supposed to be wig shopping day!  I survived my teeth cleaning at noon yesterday, which isn't the easiest thing to get through when nauseous, and I thought my "reward" would be Daniel's and my 11 AM appointment at the wig shop today.  We were going to have lots of laughs trying on all different colors and styles.  I'm pretty sure I won't go with blond.  I wore a blond wig on "spirit day" at SPU last year where we were supposed to dress up as someone.  I dressed as Sandy from Grease with blond wig and Renee's black leather pants.  Little did I know that none of my colleagues decided to join in for spirit day and that afternoon, I had forgotten I needed to attend a going away party for one of our VP's up in the President's Administrative Suite.  To say that experience was a little uncomfortable is a huge understatement, and it has soured me on life as a blond.

Anyway, I digress.  Rather than getting to go wig shopping today, last night I developed very bad pains in the area of the port that is in my right hip.  It is swollen, pink, tender to the touch, and I got a fever.  My doctor called in antibiotics and said she wanted to look at it this morning at 8:30.  I thought--no problem.  See the doc from 8:30 to 9, home for a rest, then hit the wig shop at 11.  Instead, I was in that doctor's office for over four hours getting bloodwork (infection), i/v antibiotics, i/v fluids (severely dehydrated and low blood pressure), and mercifully, i/v anti-nausea drugs!  Everyone in my doctor's office is super nice and comforting.  They gave us snacks, waters, a DVD player, People magazines, and we watched Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality.  But after that adventure, I was far too tired for trying on wigs.

Instead, we came home and had a lovely brief visit from my beloved aunt and uncle, Julianne and Oliver, and then, buoyed by all those fluids and antibiotics, and the rain having stopped briefly, Daniel and I walked around our block which is about four city blocks.  It felt so good to be outside!!

The other strange thing about today is that I tried my first "half dropperful" of the medical marijuana "essence."  It's not supposed to make you high--just help with nausea and appetite.  Truthfully, I felt/feel nothing.  Maybe will try the full dose of one dropperful next time.  Trying it, however, made me say to Daniel "what kind of alternate reality am I living in now?!"  One month I'm snowshowing in Leavenworth after Christmas (I'm a non-drinker and have never smoked pot) and the next I'm back and forth to the hospital and the doctor's office, in for tests (abdominal ultrasound tomorrow to see what's going on at that swollen/sore port site), and squirting pot juice under my tongue! 

Some of you know me as someone who is a planner and likes to be in control.  So it's pretty whacky having all your plans change daily and having very little control over anything (well, at least over my body and the flow of my days).  Many of you have sent me the Bible verse in Jer. 29:11 about God knowing the plans He has for us, plans to prosper and not to harm us, to give us a future and a  hope.  He knew that today I needed fluids and antibiotics more than I needed that wig and each day I'm learning more and more that He is in control and His plans are far better than mine.  Working on relaxing, trusting God, and going with the flow. 

And in case I don't make it to the wig shop on time, a woman from Steve's work (Marianne) knitted and sent home to me today two new beautiful hats!  And Aunt Julianne brought me a lovely scarf.  Thanks to you both and thanks to all the friends from SPU, Children's, church, and life who sent me cards today.  I think I got FIVE today.  And thanks to Lisl for the amazing dinner last night.  I have the best support team in the world.  I am blessed! 

Love,
Gabrielle

1/27/13 Magic Man

Steve

Gabrielle is still fighting the nausea, big time.  Has no appetite…since last entry, she has had half an English muffin, and had to force it down at that.  This prompted all of us to put our heads together and come up with a plan.  I reminded everyone that at our last visit, Gabrielle got a prescription for medical marijuana.  Renee did some research, looking for the best resources, while Daniel scoped out the various preparations of the stuff to see which ones did the best job at cutting down on her nausea and stimulating her appetite at the same time but without the “high” of smoking the stuff, which she clearly did not want.  It seems that there are various elixirs that you can buy with the main component, THC.  Supposedly, this won’t make you loopy, goofy, or diminish your chances of retaining your Scrabble champion title.  However, there were no real specifics on things like prices, amounts, weekend specials, or the day old bin like at the bakeries.  This called for an in-person visit, conducted by yours truly. 

After donning a trench coat and dark glasses, I ventured out (after all, I am a respected member of the north end medical community and didn’t want to give the wrong impression to any patients that may be driving down Aurora on this rainy Sunday afternoon).  I drove on past the establishment in question, which was nestled between a couple of high end motels on Aurora: the Seal and Orion, if memory serves me correctly.  Was too nervous to go right in, so I took a detour to the nearby Home Depot and asked the friendly greeter if they had any yew bushes.  This is something Daniel and I have been discussing as a possible nice addition to our back yard, as Taxol, one of Gabrielle’s chemo drugs, is a derivative of the Western yew.  The greeter was clueless, so steered me in the direction of the nursery where I found to my great dismay that they don’t have them.  Skunked. 

On the way out, I thought I would do the greeter a favor by reporting back on what I had found, just to be ready for the next yew seeker.  “No yew today.” I said.  He looked at me like I was from Mars or if I had just told him Who’s on first and What’s on second.  It didn’t help that I hadn’t combed my hair yet and had a three day growth of beard.  But, honestly, you’d think the guy would have remembered me as I had just asked him not five minutes earlier “where’s the yew?”

So, I’ve got my nerves up and drive into the parking lot of the “collective”.  100% honest to goodness truth, all that follows is true.  That last little bit about the trench coat may have been an embellishment, but not the yew guy.  The name of the place was “Fweedom”.  I half expected to be greeted by Elmer Fudd complaining about “dat pesky wabbit!”  Instead, there’s a stark waiting room with some “gardening” magazines on the table, an ATM machine in the corner and a friendly woman (who didn’t look at all like Elmer Fudd) who greeted me behind what must have been two inch thick bullet proof plate glass with three really tiny holes drilled in it so she could hear what I was saying.

I asked about their product line.  Heck, I didn’t know where to start.  She said to go to their website, “killdawabbit.com”, or something like that.  I asked if she could just give me a brief overview.  Not a chance as I wasn’t the holder of the very necessary, much coveted, often sought, but rarely granted by this doctor, medical marijuana card.  OK, off to the next place to try again.

Tooling up Aurora, I pulled in to the parking lot of another “collective” where this time I was greeted by someone bearing a striking resemblance to Shaft from the old 70’s TV series.  Once again, he was safely positioned behind plate glass.  Behind him, a bored looking crew was working with large bags of “product”.  He also told me that he couldn’t show me or tell me anything as I wasn’t the holder of the card.  I asked if there was anything he had that didn’t make you sleepy.  He said that sleepy was a good thing if you were in pain.  Here, to demonstrate, he held his massive hand up and laid his cheek against it to make the sleeping motion as if he were a toddler in pre-school having nap time.  He looked so peaceful “dozing” there behind that plate glass, wearing that braided gold necklace.

As I drove away, I turned on the radio and heard the final strains of Credence Clearwater’s “Lookin’ Out My Backdoor” about “tambourines and elephants all playin’ in the band, won’t you take a ride on the flyin’ spoon, doo doo doo, wond'rous apparition, provided by magician…”  Now that’s the experience I was after with Gabrielle, but no dice.  I thought to myself, that that was a good medical marijuana song, but that an even better one was the one about the magic man and “let’s get high a while”, though I hasten to add that Gabrielle gave me strict instructions that she didn’t want to get high.  Next thing you know, honest to medical collective truth here, the song came on!  It was a miracle.  There was Heart singing about “last night when I was not so strong you know, a pretty man came to me…never seen eyes so blue (OK, so mine are brown)” and then the famous line “let’s get high a while”.  This was not five minutes after I thought it. 

Once again, I had no interest in getting Gabrielle “high” but I did indeed want to be her Magic Man and come back with some goodies from one of the collectives on Aurora.  No such luck.  No luck for “yew” either.  Home Depot is out.  But, I figure that if I can “think” a song to be played, what with that Magic Man stuff, I ought to be able to think that cancer right out of Gabrielle’s body.  And right now, I’m thinking real hard about that.

As for being a Magic Man, I guess I will leave that to Heart.  And now, I am heading out with my pal, Dean, for a brisk swim at Edmonds while the kids hold down the fort.

Steve

1/27/13 Nadir

Steve

Nadir.  That’s the word that was bandied about a few times during our pre-chemo meeting.  It means low point, especially as it pertains to white blood cells and other lab values.  For example:  “The nadir for your white cells will be 10-14 days after the chemo treatment”.  That’s the period of time when the body is the weakest and is thus most susceptible to infections.  But nadir, in a broader sense, can apply to other things as well.

For years, I have told people that my office is located at the nadir of Holman Road.  If you’re familiar with this road, which connects the lovely areas of Greenwood with Crown Hill, you know that it dips down to roughly the QFC area before heading back up.  For some reason, not sure why, I have gotten quite a few puzzled looks when I describe by office’s geography in such terms.  Lately, I have switched my approach and tell them that my front door looks directly at the garbage cans of Luisa’s Mexican Restaurant.  The lights go on.  They all know where Luisa’s is, nadir or no nadir (great hand-rolled tortillas await you at check-in, by the way).

Another nadir can be moods or just plain feeling crummy.  They warned us about that too.  Nurse Janelle said that Gabrielle would feel the worst on days two and three after chemo and slowly improve for a couple of days before it all hits again.  Well, that’s what we’re in right now.  Nothing tastes good.  I offered Gabrielle anything under the sun for breakfast, to which she said “no” to everything, but finally (more as a gesture to make me feel better, no doubt) agreed on letting me make her some bland pancakes with applesauce.  She ate just over one.  Didn’t sleep well last night.  Stomach was churning and gurgling.  Is still getting significant drainage from part of her abdominal incision.  She is worried that all the medicine is leaking out, but I assured her that there is plenty that is sticking around to do the job, otherwise she wouldn’t feel so lousy.

She is wondering if she has the strength to do this for 18 weeks.  I counter with the fact that she is the strongest person I know and that she will do fine.  However there will be tough challenges along the way, like last night and today, but that she’ll get through them.  One day at a time.  Or as she likes to say, “Eyes on Jesus.”  That’s a good place to focus, don’t you think?

The kids have made one of those paper chains that are popular around Christmas time to go on the tree right up along with strings of popcorn and ornaments made out of cellophane-wrapped sugar cookies.  It’s got 126 links, one for each day.  They have written encouraging notes or Bible verses on each one.  Each day down, and another link comes off.  Right now, it is draped along the banister.  Eyes on the prize.  We’ll get through this.

I also remind Gabrielle that the term “nadir” implies that the opposite also exists:  zenith, or high point.  You can’t very well have a nadir without that now, can you?  To go back to my Holman Road analogy, zenith is an apt term, as at the Zenith of Holman Road, you will find such fine establishments as Dick’s Burgers (a Seattle institution that gives Inn ‘n Out Burgers a run for its money), Holy Grounds Coffee and Daniel’s favorite: Value Village.  That’s the Crown Hill Zenith.  The Greenwood Zenith has Bick’s where Rachel Ray once did an episode.  They have one mighty tasty (albeit pricey) hamburger.

So the nadir of Gabrielle’s emotions and how she is feeling will soon give way to a zenith.  Along the way, we look at little bright spots:  the birds at the feeder outside the window, cheerful flowers, plants and cards, a bright, airy house which sure beats nine days of Room 440 at Northwest (no offense, you guys at Hotel Northwest were awesome…you just weren’t home).

And that’s Sunday.  Thanks for your prayers and support.  Now, if I can just talk Gabrielle into a trip to Dick’s or Bick’s, we’ll be making some real progress.